=]

ahhh. I cannot tell you enough how wonderful it feels to have my fingers on the keys of my laptop again. That's right! IT'S FIXED!! I was shocked bc I thought it was gone forever, but one of my dad's friends apparently is a super genius who saved my computer.... along with all of the pictures I thought I had lost forever. I'm so happy!!!!

Well, the holidays are almost over. Tonight is the last big celebration for awhile. I had an amazing holiday season. So many blessings, great time with family, lots of delicious food, lots of new presents!!!

I got some AWESOME decorations for my house! I can't wait to put them up-- that's actually what the hubs & I are doing today... I'll have to try and post some pics of the finished products. Somehow the decoration gene passed right over me and I feel like I can have a tacky taste at tims, but I reeeallllly tried this time & I think the end result will actually be cute--- and maybe, jsut maybe, kinda stylish? haha. Ok, maybe that's taking it too far! But I also have done some projects of my own that I'm kinda proud of... pics to come!

Another thing I got a lot of for Christmas was running gear. Now I have no excuse to start running again. That was my exact thought yesterday as I called Shirley (the mom-in-law) up to go on a run with me. I happily put on a cute new running outfit, laced up my new shoes, and ran out the door with Ry's phone with my RunKeeper ready to track the run. 4.75 miles later, I was no longer "cute" in my running outfit, my feet and legs were killing me, and I wanted to just push STOP on the phone! lol... But that's why I love Shirley, she pushes me & honestly I had no idea that I could have done that many miles so soon after not running for so long! It def helped having her to chat with as we went along & Ryka on a leash to kinda help pull me up those hills LOL... But today I can barely walk. It's ok tho, I'm still kinda proud of myself!

One more week of break. My, it's flown by. But I've really enjoyed it a lot. A lot a lot. 16 more weeks until I'm an RN. 16 more weeks until this season of my life as a student ends. 16 weeks til I'm in the real world finally doing what I've dreamed of doing for so long! And 16 weeks til I'm finally making a little mulah to help out the hubs & get to spend more on fixing up the house, etc!
I know this semester will fly by, and I want to soak up everything I can to learn and to enjoy the time I have left with the amazing friends I have made along the way.

I hate catch-up blog posts. Next time I'll write something more meaningful- something that I've been learning...

HAPPY NEW YEARS EVE EVERYONE!
I'll write again next year :)

True Beauty.

Somewhere along my journey with the Lord I have found something very near and dear to my heart. A message that I wish all girls could take and fully believe and live 100%. A message that I am striving to fully live out as well.

BEAUTY.

It has been instilled in every women the desire to feel beautiful, to be loved, to be confident in herself.

I have always struggled with self image. It's just been my battle. To be honest, my weight is always something hanging over me- I always strive to exercise more, eat better, etc. And when I fail (usually daily) it's hard for me to feel confident, to love myself, to feel beautiful. I've already posted about the "happy weight" that tends to creep up on you when you are truly happy and married... but this is my insecurity. I don't like to share it, because it honestly is a weak spot for me in my self confidence. With this being said, I know every women has something about her that keeps her from being CONFIDENT, from feeling BEAUTIFUL.

There are a million books out there that tells us as women to LOVE OURSELVES. To come to the place where we accept ourselves for who we are, the way God created us, just as we are. And to JUST BE CONFIDENT! Yeeeeea I wish it was that easy, but it's not. I've tried it a million times- just think "I'm ok the way I am". But somehow self pep talks just never seem to cut it for me.

But girls, there is a way to feel truly confident and truly beautiful. I have experienced this before.... The closer we are to God in our relationship with him, the more we begin to overflow with confidence, the feeling of being loved and sought after, and authentically beautiful.

I want to share with you some of my favorite author, Leslie Ludy, that has had enough of the world's way to finding confidence. I hope it opens your eyes to this subject as it did me. This comes from her book "Set-Apart Femininity".

Despite the well-meaning Christian campaign to boost the modern young woman's self confidence, the reality is that we do not possess anything beautiful or worthwhile in or of ourselves. If we obtain a worldly outer beauty, we only have a propped-up, hollow, fleeting appeal that quickly fades with time and age. As Proverbs 31:30 says, "Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing." And if we muster all the human heroism and try to become a "good person", we only have a self-made, faltering form of goodness that can never stand against the stunning righteousness of Jesus Christ.

At first glance, it may appear to be wonderful and even spiritual sounding message to discover our own beauty and learn to love and accept ourselves "just the way we are". But if we rely on something that we possess to make us beautiful, we cannot receive the supernatural, transforming beauty of Jesus Christ.

This is the whole point of the Gospel: the whole message of what Christ does for us. We must lay down everything of self and be overtaken by a power, strength, beauty, and grace that is wholly not our own. That's when we find the ability to live out the supernatural, divinely beautiful, valiantly herioc Proverbs 31 life that He has called us to live as set-apart women.

Our sinful, self-lovingature urges us to buy into the idea that in and of ourselves we are important, noticed, and captivating. Yet the truth of the Gospel is not based on our intrinsic loveliness, but the fact that Christ loved us even while we were yet sinners, naked and covered in our own blood and shame (see Ezekial 16:6).

Any human beauty, any human value that we might find within ourselves is just a filthy rag compared to the limitless beauty and glory of Jesus Christ. Christ's beauty is perfect. And, in spite of what we deserve, He desires to adorn us with is spectacular glory. He may choose to showcase His beauty through us in a unique way, through our own individual personalities or the special gifts He has given us. But it is not our unique beauty that must shine for this world to see. It is not our own beauty that we must discover and embrace-- it is His.

We will not overcome our insecurities and gain the sparkling confidence we long for by singing "The Greatest Love of All" or reading books that exhort us to "live out our own beauty". And we will not become world-changing, set-apart women by letting "self flash off frame and face." The secret to becoming the radiant, beautiful, alluring, lily-white princess of childhood dreams is forgetting all about self and becoming completely consumed with only one thing-- Jesus Christ.

How encouraging that is to me today! I don't have to look to my self, as I do all too often, to find confidence. But rather I can look to my Jesus, and as I fall more in love with Him he gives me a true confident radiance and beauty that can only come from Him. My prayer is that as women, we can all give our insecurities to Him and allow Him to begin transforming our lives, attitudes, and confidence.

"If a soul has any beauty, it is because Christ has endowed that soul with His own, for in ourselves we are deformed and defiled! There is no beauty in any of us but what our Lord has worked in us." - Charles Spurgeon

Like a lily among thorns is my darling among the maidens.
-Song of Solomon 2:2

Catching Up

Wow. I haven't had a chance to post in so long. I have missed writing in my blog! But the past few weeks have been crazy busy with Thanksgiving, finals, etc. My first day of break is today. Whew, I can finally catch my breath and relax for a bit. I'm definitely going to enjoy this month of freedom, it has been a long time coming!!!

Mom and I came down to Meemaw's for the night and so we've had a fun night. We ate dinner and just had some girl talk. Then some exciting news came- my uncle and his wife just got 2 little kiddos to adopt! We are ecstatic! This is the 2nd adoption that has taken place in my family lately. It has truly opened my eyes to the adoption process. It is so touching to see these precious babies come from horrible conditions to a warm and loving home.... and how you so easily love them just like your own. I'm so happy for my aunt and uncle!

Tomorrow we're gonna do a little Christmas shopping. Speaking of Christmas, I'm finally getting in the spirit. My house is now decorated, with our stockings hung over the fireplace. It's cozy- it's nothing fancy, mostly just decorations that Mom has passed down to me. But just knowing it's ours- our home all decorated for Christmas. Being young and married and being able to enjoy our cozy little festive home together is something special for me. It's something I'd always dreamed of. Our first home, a hodge podge of Christmas decorations, a little Christmas tree, and two people who are very blessed.

Last week Ryan and Trev's band All We Know performed in downtown Springfield. They put on an awesome show with some of their new songs that were rockin'! But how they ended it was so touching. Craig gave their testimony as a band, saying this is what they wanted people to take away from them...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spnxE-s0KKs
Check it out. It honestly melted my heart, of course I am biased, but I was so proud of them.
And I don't think I'd ever loved my husband more. I'm one lucky girl.

I've had a lot of things on my heart lately, things I've wanted to blog about but haven't been by a computer! Now that I'm on break for a month I really want to spend some time growing in the Lord while I won't have as many distractions and things pulling for my time. I definitely feel the difference when I'm not being consistent in reading my bible and spending time with God. I have bought some new books and can't wait to dive into them as well! One more goal is to do some pinterest projects for my house as well as rearranging and decorating/painting in some of our rooms.

Being here with Meemaw is so fun and I love it, but after 2 years it's still soooo hard to be away from my husband. I am so used to our life together and sharing everyday with my best friend, that when I'm away from him it's like a piece of me is missing. We are so attached lol. I never thought I would be this way with someone, but he truly is my other half! I have loved every minute of our marriage, even the hard times, because it has brought us so close and our love has only gotten deeper. I'm thankful and blessed and so happy that God made him perfectly for me! Hopefully over break I can finish the book "Created to be his help-meet" that I had gotten over halfway through. It was so convicting and really showed me God's plan for me as a wife. Maybe there will be posts to come! I love sharing what I'm learning as I continue on this crazy journey of life!

Eat Up!

I had just told Sarah that I hardly ever got the stomach flu. I obviously forgot to knock on wood!

Being sick is no fun, being naseous is the worst. I don't think I will ever be able to handle morning sickness, so props to all you moms out there. Finally though, I am starting to feel like the old me again. At least I've gotten to hang out somewhere besides with my head in a trashcan.

Thanksgiving is next week! Here's to turkey, dressing, and pumpkin pie! I hope I don't end up looking like a stuffed turkey after it's all said and done though. HA! Seriously, on the Today Show this morning they gave tips on how to not eat too much on the holidays. Like eating raw veggies, yogurt, or nuts before the meal and then being able to pass on all the bad stuff. REALLY? The holidays should be the one time people just relax and enjoy some food and family. I'm all for trying to be a healthy eater/person, but not to that extreme. Live a little, people.

So this Thanksgiving, eat up. You are beautiful the way you are. You can run it off the next day if you are that worried about it LOL. Because if I died on Black Friday I'd sure be glad I ate that last piece of pumpkin pie. No regrets!

Cravings

I had such a refreshing weekend at Women of Faith Conference in Oklahoma City. I learned a lot, and I would like to share a few..

First, was worship. WOW! A stadium full of women all standing and singing "Great is Thy Faithfulness". Women of all ages, ones that could sing with experience and ones that only had seen the beginning of the faithfulness of God. It was so neat. Not to mention a tiny glimpse of what heaven might be like!

And then a message that spoke to me:

God has placed eternity in our hearts.

Ecclesiates 3:11 ...He has also set eternity in the hearts of men.

I too often run into the problem of craving more. "Well I'd just be happier if I had newer clothes, or if we put down new flooring in the house, or if Ryan took me on fancier dates, or if he did this or that, or if I was just a wee bit skinnier". Not every day do I battle this, but I do have those days when I'm just in a crummy mood soley because of cravings. Too often we think it's those world things that cause us to long for more, but really it's something that wordly things can never satisfy. God has placed eternity in our hearts, and our heart will never be completely satisfied until it finds rest in Him, in heaven. This isn't our home and this world will never be enough.... but He will.

So ultimately I learned that as a human I will always be craving until I get to heaven, because that's what my heart is longing for! But I also know that instead of focusing on these worldly cravings, when they happen if I can seek the Lord and begin craving His word and peace in my life, I will be much closer to finding true fulfillment and satisfaction. It's not really the clothes or the flooring or the extra attention from my husband or being stick thin, it's the peace and joy and love and comfort I find when I seek what my heart is really longing for-
my Heavenly Father.

I feel like if more people would act on this, and when they found themselves longing for more they would turn to the Lord, for that unfailing love they are truly craving. I believe there would be fewer broken relationships, divorce, etc.

That was a good lesson I learned that I want to begin applying to my life. And let me tell you, this morning on my way to clinicals I was nervous and dreading it and scared of being inadequate. And I spent the drive in praying and spending time with the Lord, reflecting on His promises to me. And I was more confident today- not necessarily better, just more secure that I am enough and that He isn't going to leave me high and dry.

(being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. -Philippians 1:6)

I wish I had time to share everything the ladies talked about this weekend, but I'll save them for posts to come!

2 Years Down, 100 To Go!

Whew. Time to catch up.

First off, I'm hungry. So this post may be cut short LOL. I'm craving one of our new fav dinners! Chipotle Raspberry BBQ (light) Ranch Chicken pizza on whole wheat crust topped with red onions, green peppers, and mozzerella. (My mouth watered just at the thought of this delicous dish). And I fully intend on cooking it AS SOON AS I GET HOME.

I'm on a kick this week. I've done perfect on my eating and exercise. I spent a little too much on groceries this week, but it costs more to eat healthy and I've been coming up with some super healthy dishes! This excites me. I have to be in the mood to cook and lately it's all I've wanted to do! I'm also going to make "kale chips tonight" so we'll see how that turns out. I may have to share the recipe if they turn out alright-- I've seen them in stores and they are amazingly good for you and supposedly a yummy alternative for potato chips.

Ok, enough about that! I've been dying to share about my 2 year anniversary surprise...
Ry got home and we headed up to Branson where he wouldn't tell me anything except to dress nice. He had reservations at Olive Garden (my fav) where we demolished some salad and bread sticks and pasta! Then he drove on down the strip without telling me where we were going, and surprised me by taking me to a show!!! It was the beginning of their Christmas show and I was so excited!!! We love going to the Branson shows like two little old people, but it's something we've always enjoyed together :) Afterwards we hit up Andys for custard and then got a hotel for the night. The next morning we enjoyed breakfast and mochas/lattes at Starbucks and headed on to the Landing to shop. I enjoyed myself so much.... and it was SOOO cute to see how proud Ryan was of himself for planning it all. He didn't say it, but I could tell and it just melted my heart LOL ok, enough with the mushy stuff. sorry guys! But just having a weekend totally focused on each other, good conversation, and lots of laughs does the heart good =]

I am so thankful for these 2 years. God has given me a wonderful gift in Ryan.

I think I'm going to the Women of Faith Conference in Oklahoma City tomorrow. I didn't think I was going to get to at first, but looks like its working out. I pray that God uses the speakers/musicians to speak to us women! I am excited to be uplifted and brought closer to my Lord! I'll definitely share about it when I get back!

peppermint mocha pandora days

ahhh, it's NOVEMBER people!

There are more than one reasons why I love this month:

• Our anniversary is the 7th! 2 years with my wonderful husband= celebration!!


• Thanksgiving! The one day it's totally OKAY to eat allll day long & not feel guilty.


• Beautiful weather & gorgeous trees/leaves that make me see God all around me


• The yummy coffee creamers that come out. Hello Pumpkin Spice Latte, Gingerbread, Peppermint Mocha, etc. (I could go on)


• We get to start using our cute little fireplace= coziness


• The Christmas prepartation begins! Music, decorations, cocoa, parties, etc!

So, you get the point! It's a good month if I say so myself. I've seen a lot of people posting about THANKFULNESS this month, which is awesome. We have so much to be thankful for!!! Today, I am thankful for discovering the Christy Nockels station on Pandora. Ryan's mechanics sometimes walk in and I'm belting some crazy high note. Embarassing, but good stuff nonetheless. It's neat to me that God wants our worship wherever we are, and lets us experience that even if we're in a greasy truck shop =]

Anyways, I needed to use the computer for a bit so I decided to run from my house over here to Ryan's shop... about a mile OF HILLS. I barely made it up the last hill to his shop, his grandpa was on the porch laughing at me. I must have been a funny site gasping for air "running" up the hill red as a beet. This saddens me so much, at one point in my life I could run 6 miles. Oh well, I ran today. And that's better than most days for me LOL! The only part I didn't fully consider was the getting back home part. Oh dear...

Crankiness..

So, in my post below I shared some pics from our Halloween party. I'm thankful for those couples- they are a few years older and have been great examples to Ry & I. We really look up to them, not to mention are great friends! An answer to prayer, as we have prayed for godly friends and married couples in our lives.

Today has been such a blah day. I think I need an attitude adjustment! Anyone?

For some reason today I let the stress of future plans once again freak me out.
Where will I work? Can I do this? Hospital or clinic? Bachelors? Masters? Nurse Pracitioner?
It goes on and on... not to mention 2 big tests on Thursday that I've only slightly studied for.
Wah. Wah. Wah.

And then I got overwhelmed.
More from the fact that I'm constantly worried if I know enough or will be good enough as a nurse. It's a scary thing, working with people whose lives are in your hands. But also there is beauty in it- a chance to pour into someone's life when they need it most. Today I wasn't able to focus on that to say the least.

Somedays it's hard to not let those feelings and thoughts just make you no fun to be around!

We talked in Sunday school about how we let the things of the world drag us down... we start searching for happiness instead of experiencing the joy of the Lord every day.

Soooo I went for a walk with my puppies and asked the Lord to help me focus less on myself, my worries, my happiness.. and to focus on who He is, what He has done, and the joy that He gives us daily.
Then I came over to visit Ryan, and he asked if I'd like to go to a haunted house and out to dinner. Well, how bout that! Instead of letting my crankiness win the rest of the day, I'm gonna smile and enjoy my night with my husband. And try to hide from him the fact I've been a very cranky girl today!!

Happy Halloween!

Just wanted to share a few pics from our Halloween part. We had some great couples over that we have gotten to know & really love! We had a super fun night!

Happy Sunday

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRwUN9aO_oI

Starting out this Sunday with some worship. New favorite song. So beautiful!

I love that God lets experience worship wherever we are. I'm over in Ryan's cold empty shop using the computer all alone... I hope no one can hear me singing this loud LOL. Anyway... enjoy some worship today!

This is the day that LORD has made, let us REJOICE and be GLAD IN IT!

Happy Sunday!

He Is Constant

FINALLY! My blog's makeover is complete. Doesn't it look cute?! Much better. I was needing a change.

Speaking of change, that's what I'm blogging about today.

I could write 15 whole pages over how my life has changed these past few years, but I'll spare you. Not to say change is necessarily BAD, it just takes ADJUSTMENT. And sometimes it can simply stress you out, even if in the end it's a good change. Even right now, the season/weather is changing. Change is something we will deal with our whole lives. Yearly, Monthly, Daily, Hourly, Secondly (is that a word? lol). Today I was feeling a little overwhelmed with some of the changes in my life. Frankly, I was driving home to an empty and messy house today and was a little cold from my lack of a coat due to this weather change... and I thought: "man, all I want to do is go to Sarah's and walk, have cofffe, and be with my best friends like I could do so easily when I lived at home." Thinking about it made me sad for a moment. But wait, you love your new life being married, having a home of your own, a little farm perfect for walks, etc.!! Of course I do... but it doesn't mean that the whole CHANGE that went along with it doesn't hurt my heart sometimes.

Sometimes I wish I was still 10 years old and the only worries were getting off school to drive 1.2 miles down the road to Sarah's house to "play" like we did EVERYDAY and then come home to Mom and Dad's for a big supper, Dad WALKING in the door with his UPS browns on, little Trevy actually being LITTLE, and enjoying a night as a family. I could go on... and it's not that I dislike where I am now, I actually LOVE it. It's exactly where I need to be in my life. BUT the change that went along with getting here was tough at times. Get the idea of things?

So I said ALL of that to share this: While I was driving home, having that thought, feeling a twinge of sadness about the way life had changed, three words popped into my head.

HE IS CONSTANT.

It was like a breath of fresh air!

HE IS CONSTANT.

When life around us is changing, and will continue to the rest of our lives here on earth, we have a FATHER who is CONSTANT. Never changing. Always that safehold, strongtower, and refuge to run to.

What a beautiful thought!
I hope that thought encourages you today as it did me!

Malachi 3:6
“For I, the LORD, do not change; therefore you, O sons of Jacob, are not consumed.”

Bums R Us

We woke up at 7:30 again today. FAIL. The past 2 mornings our alarms have been set for 5:30 & then 6:30 (in hopes that an extra hour would be enough)... but nooooo we finally rolled out of bed closer to 7:45.

I could blame it on the weather and how the cool air is perfect for sleeping with the windows open, and how that cool air makes under the covers so warm and cozy- you know the feeling. Where you just can't get out from under the covers. Sure, that's a good excuse. But really, I feel like it's because we are becoming BUMS. lol Any type of self discipline has been a challenge for me lately, even if it's getting up earlier to get the things I need done... and for Ryan and I that was supposed to be exercising together every morning or at least time to make a pot of coffee and enjoy it on our porch together.

Apparently self discipline is not just MY issue, Ryan swears he is on a diet (I think he is making fun of me LOL) but last night while I was doing my workout video (day#2!! wahooo) he was eating burritos and soup and later at 9 pm right when we were getting cozy on the couch, he looks at me with his sweetest poutiest little face and said "Dessert". Seriously!!??!!! But how could I say no, after all he put in a 13 hour day. So at 9:30 he was chowing down on some chocolate pie. Spoiled! But so am I, it's the least I can do for him, he works so hard for us!!

Anyway, self discipline. Am I the only one that struggles with this? Even if it's my constant struggle with healthy eating/exercise to waking up early to get things done to studying before LAST minute... this is something I need to work on.

But some days it just feels good to be a bum... :)

Victorious

Ok, so I promised some health posts... well the best I've got is that I bought Jillian Michael's new workout video. It's "Ripped in 30" (riiiiight lol), but I'm really going to try to stick to it for the next 30 days (riiiiight)... No really, I'm going to try! I'm trying to get back into this slowly. This weeks goal: get back on my vitamins and drink my 64oz. of water a day. Sounds tiny, but I'm so inconsistent on both of these and I know they are the basic most important things! I'm also going to focus on eating around 1200 calories a day- the video actually came with a meal plan so we will see.

Ok, enough about that!

I had a wonderful weekend filled with lots of time with friends, date night with the hubby, and a Sunday on our farm cleaning out the garage, mowing, and making our little humble abode look adorable! I feel thankful for the life God has blessed me with, including all the friends and family that make it so great. Not to say there aren't days I want to just pull my hair out, but daily I'm choosing to open my eyes to the blessings that God has given me, even if it's a cup of coffee and worship music on my way to a LONG day of class, instead of focusing on the things that drag me down or bum me out... and not every day do I win.

Mom said a few months ago something that stuck with me. If we THINK defeat we will be defeated but if we THINK victory, we will have victory! A simple concept, sure, but if you put it into practice in life it really works. God has already given us the victory, we just need to claim it! LOL I sound like a name-it-claim-it Christian now, but really!! Something I have found helpful is finding scripture that help me in the areas I struggle and memorizing them and using them as ammo when the bad thoughts/frustrations start trying to steal my joy. For example, I'm always a worry wort, constantly afraid I'm dying or someone around me is (aka: hypochondriac LOL).
But seriously, I had to memorize this verse:
2 Timothy 1:7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.
And I have used it time after time in many situations. It's a promise of what I have as a child of God! Something I can use to combat thoughts that the mean ol' devil tries to get me to believe!

So that's my bit of advise for today- think VICTORIOUS thoughts and use some SCRIPTURE to defend your peace, joy, happiness, etc. today :)

Love,
kays

Happy Weight x2

Blaaaaaaaaaaaah! What a week! Nursing school has definitely gotten the best of me lately- just in time for our ONE week without a test... I can't wait to relax and get some much needed "me" time in this coming week! It's off to a good start-- tomorrow lunch with my best friends & Saturday we're having a nursing class fall party for all the girls to bake, have cider & lattes, and just hang out, then one of my best friend's wedding showers... Exciting stuff!

A few posts ago I wrote about the "happy weight" that has snuck up on us..... It seems SO easy to gain & SO hard to get off. Being so busy I've had so much trouble getting back into a consistent exercise program- the eating has been pretty good for the most part, but then there are weekends when we go out or have special occasions... and it's so easy to just grab some of that yummy stuff...

I need some motivation.

I want to get back into a consistent running/workout schedule... but it's sooooo hard!!!
Ryan said that if we start getting up every morning and working out that in 2 weeks it will become habit. It's just SO HARD especially when my bed seems so cozy!! Sooo... MOTIVATE ME PEOPLE!!! I'm going to start tracking my progress on here, maybe that accountability will help. So maybe, just maybe I'll start posting interesting articles on health & exercise that will help us along the way :)

Iron Sharpens Iron

Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.
Proverbs 27:17

Today I was thinking about just how thankful I am for the role models & enouragers in my life. There are a few special people that God has blessed me with that I look up to wholeheartedly. I can say with confidence that as I look to them as an example, it is as if looking to Christ as one because their life is such a reflection. The impact they have on my life is huge.

I was blessed with a very godly heritage of women in my life. I have always called my Meemaw (mom's mom) my angel. If anything is ever wrong at all, we say "call Meemaw to pray". What a testimony that is in itself! I, and my whole family, know that she is a pray warrior that is so close to the Lord. Not only is it just that she'll say a prayer for us, but she BELIEVES IT. Her faith is unlike anyone's I know. She fully trusts on Jesus in every situation and is not shy in doing so. We can be driving down the road and she will just pray out loud over whatever situation is going on, whether its a simple headache or we're talking about something huge that's going on in our lives. Also, she's been a nurse for almost 40 years and has led many many of her patients to the Lord.... another reason I aspire to be like her.

Then there is my Granny- dad's mom. Another tried and true prayer warrior. I have seen her drop to her knees many of times in prayer, and have some wonderful memories of her in the kitchen cooking and singing old gospel songs. The thing that sticks out to me is her love and devotion to her family. Her husband died when he was in his early 30's, leaving her with her 3 young kids. She could have done many things, but she chose to devote her life to loving her family and being faithful in church. I never met my grandpa, but I know the love she had for him. I've seen her cry like it was yesterday that she lost him when talking about him, making his favorite pie, or telling about a dream she had of him. Unconditional love is something she has taught me. She raised her children to be godly parents as well- and for as long as I can remember has been cooking for and serving her family... I've heard her testify in church so many times the verse in Hebrews "He will never leave us nor forsake us" and I know that is the promise that has been her mainstay thru the trials she has faced in her life. I will always take that with me!

Then there is my mom. She has the biggest heart of anyone I know, always worrying about someone besides herself, doing something for someone besides herself. A true servant. She taught me so much growing up, and was my biggest support. I've always enjoyed our conversations sitting around the house or taking a walk- she always listens to my dreams and my concerns and knows how to encourage me. I have never seen a better wife either, and I only hope I can live up to that. Thank goodness I have such a great example of what it is to love your husband, be submissive, and see God's blessings from that. She makes me want to be a better person and I'm so thankful for the way she raised me and loved me, even when I didn't see that she really is my best friend. Her servant heart definitely reflects Christ and her strength in being a Proverbs 31 lady is a huge example to me.

I have a lady that has been "my second mom" as I was at her house almost everday growing up playing with her girls. Pollyanna has set the highest standard of being a homemaker- and I look to her as being such a wonderful mom and wife. She is so thrifty and can make the cutest things. She sews, cooks, decorates, makes handmade cards, knits... I could go on and on! I look up to her so much as she has raised such godly girls and is such a wonderful wife. Another Proverbs 31 lady in action for sure! Now that I have a house and husband of my own, I definitely look to her as a role model and example as she has looked to Lord for knowing how to be such a wonderful person.

Finally, there is one lady that has been so amazing to meet with me over the years for coffee or lunch and has really been a mentor in my life. Her words are so comforting and encouraging, and never condeming. She sets an example of having an intimate relationship with Jesus- spending time with Him daily and the treasures found in His word. I am so appreciative of our friendship- just by talking to her I want to be a better person!!! I would definitely say she is a mentor to me, she prayers for me, sends me little texts of encouragement, and is a wonderful role model in how she lives her life. I'm very thankful for Jennifer Usrey!!

So, it felt good to just write about the ladies in my life that have impacted me, sharpened me, and encouraged me to be a better person simply in the way they live their life. I only pray that someday I can be that kind of example for someone!

Baby Fever

Holy cow, I've come down with baby fever lately!

Ryan probably would like me to start talking about something else besides baby names. LOL Everywhere I look there is a BABY or an adorable pregnant girl. It seems like right now everyone my age is beginning to have the excitement of their first baby/pregnancy...

Naturally, I absolutely CANNOT wait for when Ry & I get to this part of our lives! I know I'm not the only one feeling this way, Ryan has became best buddies with one of the little girls at our church and he just can't get enough of how sweet she is-- it totally melts my heart to watch the two of them playing together-- but I also know that Ry is really looking forward to when he's the one being called "daddy".

Now, if I can just get through school..... then we can talk baby :) Of course, whenever God chooses to bless us we'll be totally happy!

Hosanna

Finally my fingers touch a keyboard again :) Ah, I have been dying to blog lately and with a crashed computer that just wasn't happening. I'm visiting mom's today for a walk and some chai tea and thought I'd squeeze in a quick blog! I could go on about the stress/confusion of nursing school but I'd rather talk about the lighter things of life! Like this beautiful weather, my sweet husband, and the life of newlyweds. Of course, I say we are newlyweds- but we are coming up to our TWO YEAR ANNIVERSARY! Holy cow! It literally seems like yesterday... It's so cliche, but time really does fly when you are having fun.
The other day I stopped to think about how blessed I really am. I feel like I have this genuine bond with my husband that didn't exist even in our first few months of marriage. Love takes work, but honestly, as we have grown closer as a couple learning each other more and growing closer to the Lord, we seemed to have this sweet appreciation of one another. I love when I look over at my husband and he gives me the sweetest smile and holds me close... it's something that goes deeper than that superficial glance- it's something that God put together, something we couldn't have made on our own, something I'm so thankful for. It's kind of hard to explain- almost something spiritual, knowing God is smiling down on what He has put together. I'm just thankful for 2 years with my best friend and being able to learn more about our roles in this marriage and being more in love & excited today than we were 3 years ago when we were meeting in Branson to go on our first date :)

Ok, ok, enough about the mushy married talk LOL I know I blog about that a lot- it's just that it's been a major adjustment in my life learning to be a WIFE! And, I may be getting excited to CELEBRATE these 2 years on November 7th <3

Anyway, God has been doing something so sweet in my life- something I have needed for going on 3 years. After my dad got hurt, I lost my 3 year old cousin, and then a close friend of ours- anytime a hard time came or something sad, it was like I couldn't even get a tear out. My heart had numbed and was hardened toward the things that used to break it. It frustrated me!! Sometimes I just wanted to cry or genuinely just feel sorry for someone, and even though I knew I should and wanted to, those legit feelings couldn't come about. Lately, things have been slowly seeming to touch me more, and it's almost as I feel my heart softening! Tears have came to my eyes for things that should! For unsaved souls, for children in bad situations, for the Sprit moving in a church service, for the movie Courageous (it's a MUST SEE btw!)... I have just been thanking the Lord for softening my hear to these things again... bc honestly I have wanted that part of me back for so long. After going through some really hard times, I felt callused, but I know for God to use me and to move in me my heart needs to be soft and sensitive to the things of God- things that breaks His heart as well.

I love the song Hosanna by Hillsong... my prayer today are these lyrics:

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me

Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am for Your kingdom's cause
As I go from nothing to eternity...

J29:11

Here lately I have been freaking out about my future plans.

All of a sudden I just have no clue what I'm going to do when I graduate in a few short months. I don't know where I want to work, hospital or clinic, what hours I want to work, three 12s or five 8s, or in what area I want to! All I can think about here lately is having a little family.... but that's a whole other post :) :)

It's constantly hanging over my head, stressing me out! I don't know exactly why-- probably because May is getting closer and closer all the time and the reality of actually being an RN is sinking in. Honestly, I am just going to have to surrender this to the Lord, I know that. I don't know why I have been trying to figure this out on my own this whole time! Especially when I can look back over the last few years of my life and clearly see God making the right doors open at the right time, things that I had no clue were coming but things that were 100% right for me!

At the end of the day, HE is the AUTHOR of my life's story and I need to give Him back the PEN.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I have plans for you declares the Lord; plans to prosper you not harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.

Romance Uncensored

Marriage is a perfect reflection of the marriage of Jesus to His Bride, the church. No other humanly relationship was given the privelage of representing our Savior and His first love. What a testimony we are capable of having as married people!!! But how many people can look at our marriages and see the love that Jesus has for His church? Ouch. I definitely realized this weekend at Romance Uncensored the potential that we have as a couple to make a difference for the Lord without ever shoving a Bible in someone's face or preaching the gospel at the top of our lungs. Without saying a word, I can represent the greatest and most unconditional love the world has ever seen, the love that our Lord has for His children, His church, His first love.

I learned so much this weekend at the retreat. I was convicted and challenged to love my husband and my Lord even more so. Why? Because if your relationship with your husband is HOTT, so will your walk with God be, and vice versa. If we are passionately pursuing our Savior, obeying Him, being sensitive to His leadership in our lives, so then will we be wanting to honor Him by doing the same towards our husbands. Just realizing that God has given us such a sacred and special gift in marriage is so beautiful to me. It is more than just 2 people living together and loving one another. We are painting a picture of Jesus's love for us, His bride. WOW! Ryan and I had some really great, heartfelt conversations that drew us so much closer. After 2 years and plenty of ups and downs I can honestly say I love him more than ever. Sitting there beside my best friend, knowing no one in the world knows me or loves me or protects me like he does, just melted my heart. God has made us ONE! What a beautiful thought! Sometimes I feel so undeserving... that God would choose me to receive such a precious gift. I just hope that I can give Him honor & thanks by the way I love Ryan on a daily basis! I take that for granted so many times in the busyness and craziness of life.

After the friday night session they sent you out to go on a HOTT date (no doubles allowed). It was late so we opted to go to Applebees & do 2 for $20... we stayed there for quite awhile cuddled in our booth doing our "homework" from the retreat and just talking. I was so suprised as Ryan really opened up about a lot of things and that conversation will always be special to me. After, he took me for ice cream (the key to my heart) and then we went back to the hotel... We stayed at the Branson Motor Court, a little hotel from the 1940's that costs $40 a night. It was sooo cute! Super clean, very old fashioned, and we loved it! You can make anything romantic if you want to ;) The next morning we grabbed breakfast at Starbucks (FYI the fall flavored drinks are out now and oh my yum are they delish!) and then barely made it to the conference on time! After it was over we had lunch with some friends that also went to the retreat. It was so great to see these godly couples and their love for one another as we were all so excited for what God had done in our lives this weekend! I am thankful for godly couples to look up to!

Anyway, I'm so glad that God taught us these truths this weekend and that we can begin to apply them to our everyday lives. I want our marriage to be a testimony!!

Random

Last week we had 3 tests.... and when you are in the nursing program that's an insane number because it requires an INSANE amount of studying. So I was exhausted after last week, had a super busy weekend since it was Ry's birthday, and then we have another MedSurg test tomorrow so Monday I had to start studying full force again... Basically, if I get through tomorrow I just might shout for joy. Then I have a week without a test!!! Yes, it must be a miracle! hehe... but you can bet that I'm going to enjoy myself!

School has definitely been consuming my time, but I have been DYING to dive into some DIY projects that I've found on pinterest. I really want to do 2 new canvas paintings for my house, and then make some other types of wall hangings. I'm not very good at decorating, and I want to spice up the house a little bit!!! I plan on going to some flea markets & trying to find some treasures as well =]

I ran a mile and a half today... it felt a little easier. I think the cool weather makes it easier for one. It's funny, Jack and Ryka always run with me but it's been awhile since we've really ran hard. Like me, Jack has been getting really used to just relaxing little strolls down to the creek and back. Weeellll, today when we ran a solid mile and a half I wasn't the only one gasping for air! Needless to say Jack & I are trying to get back into shape together. We used to be decent runners! LOL

This weather has definitely been making me want a cozy cup of hot chocolate. Yummm.
Oh yea, this weekend we are going to a Christian marriage retreat in Branson that's supposed to be wonderful & really fun! We are excited to spend the weekened together learning more about each other =]

This has been such a random post, but I just felt like taking a study break and writing a little. So, thanks for listening to my rambles!

Happy Weight

Ok, so Ryan and I agreed on something today. Ever since we got back from our cruise we have been super laxed about our typically semi-healthy eating habits and working out. Like, they have pretty much been non-existant...

So, all of the hubby's pants barely button and I have been waaayyy too cozy living in my big tshirts & Nike shorts every day! Unfortunatlely, we agreed we were letting the "happy weight" sneak up on us & we want to stop it before it takes over!

I hate when you see married couples let themselves go after the wedding! I don't want to be like that! Obviously, I know it's just 5-10lbs for us, but still I think it's so important to always try your best to be healthy and attractive for your husband/wife. Fortunately, ours is not from a lack of caring but more from enjoying life a little too much together! Me baking Ry his favorite brownies has to end & him taking me to get ice cream does as well... It's cracking me up, we are going on our first diet together as a married couple. So, my next few blog posts may be keeping up with our progress & possibly some healthy recipes I'm going to resort to along the way :) We want to meet our goals by November 7th (our 2 year anniversary) so that gives us about 2 months to get whipped back into shape.
I guess I better start lacing up my running shoes!

Morning Mercies

I know everyone has been going on about the weather, but I can't help but chime in!

The past few days have been breathtaking. I know I usually say summer is my favorite season, but when fall comes it always reminds me of peaceful and refreshing it is... and just how much I love it.

The past few mornings have been so perfect for a hot cup of coffee & some yummy creamer, sitting on the front porch- finally bundled up in a cozy sweatshirt :) For me, I've enjoyed sitting there and letting God teach me a few things. Really, just taking in the cool air can move you all in itself. It's like you can't take in enough of the beauty of the Lord & His creation. Just walking out on the porch these past few mornings, I've felt the spirit of the Lord there. So I got to thinking about references in the bible about seeking the Lord in the morning. I'll share what I found...

Psalm 5:3In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation.
Psalm 90:14Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.
Mark 1:35 Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.
Psalm 63:1 "O God, thou art my God; EARLY WILL I SEEK THEE...."

Lamentations 3:22-23 It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.

These are some of the verses I found. I agree with David in the Psalms, there is something about seeking God in the morning that is satisfying! You can feel His presence so strongly & it makes you GLAD all your day!! Also, Jesus got up very early in the morning to pray. I'm sure there is signficance to that...

And finally, one of my favorites! Lamentations 3:22-23.... The Lords' mercies are new EVERY MORNING! It has been so refreshing to me to get up these past few days & relish in those mercies and thank Him for them!!

Honestly, the past few morning have not been intense prayer times for me or reading chapter after chapter in my bible (which is important none the least)... but have simply been enjoying a cup of coffee on my front porch, letting the cool air, the new day & the new mercies remind me of God's FAITHFULNESS to me & simply thanking Him silently as I enjoy His creation and experience the joy and peace He gives us as His children.

So I'm thankful for this weather, as it has drawn me closer to Him.

Date Night

Last night Ryan took me to the Carroll County Fair. When he first mentioned it, I said our other option- sushi- sounded better. But he really wanted to go so we did.

Let's just say by the end of the night I was like a little kid again! LOL We watched the rodeo, rode rides, played the games, drank their super sugary lemonade, & looked at the animals! It was so cute- Ryan even threw darts at balloons and won me a stuffed pig! LOL The night ended perfectly on the Ferris Wheel & then we we headed home.

I love nights like that. Nights when nothing else matters expect being
young and
in love and
enjoying each other's company.
xoxoxo

Reverence

Hello, life as a nursing student. Sooo almost 3 weeks in school & I'm already in head deep, but so far so good! Yesterday I had a GREAT day at clinicals. I got a chance at starting 3 IVs & I was SUCCESSFUL at all 3! Definite confident booster. I started out feeling a little rusty, and by the end of the day I was feeling confident & things were running really smoothly. I walked out feeling like I can do this... the feeling I have to remember when there are days I want to cry!

This morning Ry & I went for a run, since we have been slacking lately. It felt good to enjoy the morning together, I'm thankful for the time we get together here at our home. It's the coziest place I can think of.

I'm still reading "Created to be His Help Meet" and it's still challenging me and convicting me. Coming into this marriage, I didn't really know what it meant to be a wifey, and so far I have learned a lot along the way!! Here is a blurb from what I read today:

"You cannot command your husband to love you. But God has provided a way for a woman to cause her husband to love and cherish her. God gave us ladies some keys to the avenues of a man's heart. God made it so that we can actually inspire him to into fulfilling his God-ordained duty. His very nature is made to respond to us if we will only treat him with reverence. God did not give men the wonderful promise He gave to women, that they can win their wives with proper behavior. But women have a beautiful hope based on the promises of God."

Here, it's talking about how we as wives can win the complete adoration of our husbands. It's not by nagging at him, trying to change him, begging him to love us/serve us/fulfill our needs. Instead, it's when we become SELFLESS and SERVE our husbands with reverence. Reverence is not just how you act; it is how you feel and how you respond with words and with your body language. It is thankfulness for his attention and affection. Deference to your man is the true height of femininity. It makes a woman beautiful, gracious, and lovely to all, but most especially to him.

We are to love, encourage, support, and follow our husbands lead. So many times we get frustrated when we feel he is not doing enough for us... but only when we turn our focus on how we can love our husband and reverence him more, will we truly captivate him and allow him to fulfill his God-ordained role. This can be a challenge for me at times! I think of the times that I tell Ryan how I appreciate how he works so hard for us, how he provides us a beautiful home... and I remember how his eyes light up! I think of how happy is he when he comes in from a long day at work to a clean house, a nice supper, and me in a smiling, happy mood! I need to be this way continually!! But we are flesh, and sometimes crankiness, stressfulness, etc. can creep in and steal great opportunities for us to love our husbands. So today I pray that God shows me more ways I can honor my husband as our love grows & that I continue to learn my role as a wife in His eyes.

The Gospel by Eric Ludy

What a way to start the day! The Ludys have been my favorite authors for years and as I looked at their website this morning I ran across this short film they did. Honestly, it's SO worth 11 minutes of your time. Very moving!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPIOkdNL-QQ

PRAISE!!!!

Yesterday morning I was about to have a breakdown. For 2 weeks the pain hadn't gone away, but the past week had been excruiating pain 24hrs a day. None of my meds the doctor had given me were helping and I was about to have a panic attack, not to mention just sit down and cry. At this point, I really thought I had something seriously wrong.

So after the house was empty, I went to my bed and dropped to my knees. I knew I had to show God I was serious... and thanks to some great examples in my life I decided I was just going to stand on God's promises, bind the pain, loose healing, and I just said "God I know that your word says that if a prayer is said WITH FAITH the sick will be healed. Not might be, but WILL be." And after I prayed, I got up and began thanking Jesus for healing me. As I got ready, drove to town, etc. I kept saying "thank you Jesus for healing me"... even as the pain kept going... because FAITH without ACTION is DEAD. I really wanted to show the Lord my faith that day.

Also, I asked my facebook friends to pray for me & my family... AND yesterday I did have some much needed advice that led me to the chiropractor. He found that my neck is completely straight, without the normal curve, probably due to whiplash I got when the softball hit me. He should me how easily it could be pinching nerves that lead to one sided pain, tingling, pinching. So he did a lot of adjustments on me, showed me a certain pillow to sleep with, etc.

SOOOO here is the PRAISE! I woke up this morning for the first time in 2 weeks PAIN FREE!

I wanted to share this, because yesterday was one of the first times, as I told Ryan, that I prayed like "mom and meemaw" LOL but seriously got serious with God, began thanking Him for what He was going to do & then He DID! Not that its surprising, but it really showed me the POWER OF PRAYER and how if we really put our faith into action He has blessings for us!!! Thank you all for praying for me! I'm so excited, even though this seems little, it is huge for me because the pain was actually really starting to wear me down! So I am sooooooooooo thankful to the LORD this morning, I just had to share!!!!!!!!

Day of Declaration

Soooo I'm so excited! Tomorrow night I'm going to a concert! But not just any concert! It's my baby brothers dream come true. His band is finally playing their first gig! I'm ecstatic for him :)

Not only that, but their first singer didn't work out so they recruited RYAN to sing. At first I was scared to death for him, since that's a huge job to fill... but I have been blown away as they practice more and more. His voice has somehow transformed (and it was good to begin with!) to a rock voice born to perform LOL but really, he has definitely surprised/impressed me!!
AND what's even more impressive is that they wrote ALL their songs- music & lyrics.
They are opening for 3 other bands which are more well known I guess. They are playing at Nathan P. Murphys at downtown Springfield, MO... I can't wait to get all dressed up for the concert & be on the front row screaming and rocking out!! haha.. can you say #1 fan??

Anyway, as excited as I am for the concert, I can't wait for it to be over because every night for the past 2 weeks it seems like Ry has been going to band practice... and I have been here alone editing pics & studying :( :( I am sooooo ready to have my husband back!!! We have been missing our nightly tradition of dinner, walk, and couch. I have been cranky this week because I have barely seen him except for "goodmorning" and "goodnight"... so as excited I am for the concert, I can't wait to have my hubby back!

Stay tuned for pics from their big debut.. =]

Whatever you do...

Today, I needed encouragement. I got up super early, made some yummy coffee, actually dressed up for school, and sat down with my bible. I was feeling nervous about going back to school and all the chaos that goes with it, so I prayed that God would give me a word of encouragement! This is the verse that really helped me this morning. Simple, but powerful:

Colossians 3:23
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.

Just what I needed to hear. School may be a minor thing in the whole scheme of things, but it is still of value to the Lord. He says that WHATEVER it is that you do, you can DO IT FOR HIM! So today I went to school with confidence knowing that I could be a student for the Lord today. I will work at it with all my heart! Because I will do it for the Lord!!

So just think, whatever you are doing today, no matter how small, you can do it for the Lord & make it count!!

10 things about me!

1) I love my hubs! LOL, seriously though, marrying Ryan was the best decision of my life. He is my best friend & every day is a new adventure when you are married to person you are meant to!

2) I am a senior in the RN program, so I'm constantly in a book! I know that all this hard work will be worth it, because in one short year I will have the job I've always wanted, not to mention finally making some money!!$$!!! This poor college child would be happy with any salary at this point :) LOL

3) I have recently became a crazy dog lady. I was not this way until Ryka came into the world. ESPECIALLY when Jack entered our family. I am obsessed with my babies. Ryan has to remind me daily that they are just dogs, not real children LOL. (ex: Ryka got a 4 piece chicken McNuggets a few days ago in town). It's bad!

4) I love to run, exercise, stay active, etc. BUT food is my weakness. I'm pretty sure I can out-eat any guy!!! Just ask my friends!

5) If I could be anything I would be a rockstar or actress. Anything to actually be in the spotlight! LOL I have always wanted to be on a drama team, buuuuut have never got the chance to be. I'm always being dramatic!

6) I love being married, but I'm still super attached to my family! And always will be! Daddy's girl right here.

7) I have some of the most amazing ladies in my family. From my loving mom, to my AWESOME pray warrior grandmothers, to my sweet aunts... I don't have to look far for the perfect role models.

8) I have became SUCH a homebody. All I want to do these days is be in my cozy little home with my little family. There is no place like it!

9) I have baby fever. Bad.

10) I have recently became addicted to couponing and getting free samples off of the internet. It is oh-so-much fun and wifey-like.

So Long Summer!

School starts THURSDAY!!
I'm excited, but at the same time I'm so nervous I could cry!
My first year was great. It was by far the most challenging year of my life, but it stretched me and I feel like I grew so much. I made a tight group of friends who I am so thankful for! We really bonded, not to mention made for one great study group. Working in the hospital was so rewarding, at times I wanted to cry I was so scared to take the first step in applying what I learned to an actual person, but every day I would walk out saying WOW I just did that!

This year, the harder stuff comes into play. ER & ICU, harder tests/study material, and preparing for the NCLEX. I think the hardest part has been break, because I've gotten out of the study habit and it's going to be hard to train myself back to having no life except a nursing book!! So please, keep me in your prayers for my final year! I can't wait to finish and walk out of there as an RN with a great job & finally being where I've worked so hard to be!

So today I'm trying to get the house in tip top shape before I am back to the stressed student who hardly has time to clean! I've also been addicted to couponing lately so I'm going to do that too :) And maybe a nap, because going to the gym this morning has already got me tired. I've been on the go lately, so a cozy day at home sounds nice =]

Dead Faith? No thanks!

FAITH. We all say we have it! Yeah, we believe there is one God, sure. We trust Him to help us through hard times, of course. We even say a prayer before we close our eyes to sleep & maybe listen to Christian music on the way to work... But I read something in my quiet time this weekend that challenged me!

JAMES 2: 14-19 & 24

14 What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? 15 Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. 16 If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? 17 In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.

18 But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.”
Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds. 19 You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder.

24 You see that a person is justified by what he does and not by faith alone.

This is what God seemed to be challenging me with. Do I just say I have faith? Or am I putting it into action?? Today, I don't want a dead faith!!! I want my actions to show my faith to the world, not just what I say but what I do!

So let's let our faith be alive today!!!

Joyfully

A Joyful Noise! I wish that was what was continually coming from my mouth, but too often it's definitely not so joyous!! This is my first post in my blog, and I want to use this blog to share what God has been laying on my heart, what has been going on in my life, etc. etc. So let's start with what has been convicting me here lately, JOY (or the lack thereof).

I've been married for almost 2 years now (crazy how time flies!!) to my absolute best friend. No one can make laugh, cry, or feel free to be myself like Ryan can. He is 100% made for me-- my soulmate. So why do I sometimes find myself getting upset over the smallest things, being cranky, and making noises that aren't joyful (ex: nagging, whining, etc.)?? Especially when I have no legit reason to be?! FLESH. It's a daily battle to choose to be JOYFUL or to be SINFUL, not to mention a real pain to be around. Luckily, we do have a choice! But it does require work- and will always be a work in progress!! Let me share what I have learned recently:

Ryan has been working extra hard lately because he has been overran with business- what a blessing, right??!! Then why do I find myself whining that he is always working, and then when he gets home a lot of the times he is so tired he falls asleep early and there I am so anxious to continue our conversations, etc. Instead of being THANKFUL I have a husband that works to provide me this beautiful home, vacations, dates, AND allows me to be a full-time student and not work while I finish the RN program; I find myself being cranky, complaining, and feeling deprived of my husband half the time! This was beginning to make the time I had with him LESS FUN because I was constantly getting my feelings hurt over something/nothing! I know my attitude was hurting the situation, not helping it, and certainly not encouraging to Ryan!!

That's when I began reading "Created To Be His Help Meet" by Debi Pearl. I have been learning so much!!! Here is a blurb from the book that convicted me & helped me in my situation:

Practice makes perfect. Life is like that. Most people have practiced hitting the notes of bitterness, sourness, hurt feelings, and frustration so long that their soul finds the discordant notes easily, almost without thought. BUT you don't have to keep on practicing discord; you can practice JOY and THANKSGIVING just as easily, and certainly with more pleasure. Every day, every right response makes the fingers of your soul find the notes of JOY and thanksgiving easier and easier, until it is so natural people will begin to notice!

Learn to enjoy life. Be thankful. Smile. When you catch yourself becoming irritated at circumstances, stop and laugh at the little things that steal your peace. Count your blessings and learn to be appreciative.

It is amazing how much you MOUTH controls your soul. You can smile and with your mouth say, "thank you God, thank you husband, etc" and your spirit is directed into gratitude with joy following. THANKFULNESS IS HOW YOU THINK, JOY IS THE ABUNDANCE IT PRODUCES.

So today I am challenged to not let those negative thoughts come into my mind, stealing my joy! I will choose to be thankful and let that thankfulness produce joy in my life! We have so much to be thankful for- I know Satan tries to blind us from that and steal our joy! But today I won't let him and I will choose to fully enjoy life JOYFULLY! My prayer is that as I cultivate an inner attitude of joy that it will pour out of me into all my relationships, allowing me to be a more JOYFUL, enjoyable, and contagious person to be around!!!

And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body, and BE YE THANKFUL. -Colossians 3:15